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Friday, November 17, 2017

Stupid Stuff!

Not much room for advertising here, but I love this cover, of my latest book, now available on Google, et, etc, and soon to be available in print. He looks sexy and she looks bewildered, just as it should be. Got to leave room for these words of wisdom.

But on to the column, Spread the Stupidity!

Only in this Stupid World do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in this Stupid World do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a diet Coke. 

Only in this Stupid World do banks leave vault doors open and chain pens to the counter.

Only in this Stupid World do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. 

......do we buy hotdogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. 

......do we have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

......Wonder why the sun lightens our hair but darkens out skin?

......Why don't you ever see the headline  'Psychic Wins Lottery?'

......Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

......Why is it that Doctors call what they do 'practice'?

......Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

......Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

......Why is the time of day with all the slowest traffic called the rush hour?

.......Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

.......Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

......Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

......You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

.......Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

.......Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

.......And  my favorite.....If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

.......One more..If flying is so safe why do they call the airport the terminal?

OK, I've already told you my favorite  now tell me yours!

 

2 comments:

Paris said...

LOL! Loved your post and we happen to have the same favorite. I really do believe (pro/con) Congress is the opposite of progress!

jean hart stewart said...

Thanks, Paris. Hope we get more opinions here. Love the stuff Mensa puts out.

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